Thursday, September 24, 2009

On Second Thought...

Wow, I really thought I would be a lot better about blogging. I love to write. I love to read. I have kept a private blog for 3 years now and I was pretty good about blogging there. What's up?

I think I finally figured it out. After a lot of thought and soul searching, I have realized why I am not sitting down and blogging.

I changed my blog from a private, password restricted blog to this very public, "hello world here we are blog" because I wanted to help others. My nightmare was over and I now had all this information, and experience and knowledge and I knew I needed to do something with it. I knew that I wanted other potential adoptive and foster parents to know what we knew. I would have given my right arm to have this knowledge under my belt when we were battling the courts, and navigating through international and domestic adoption, not to mention infertility. A lot of heart ache and aggravation can be saved if you are educated on these areas. And I am here to tell you, it is not easy to come by, especially if you are in the thick of your own experiences.

So, I came here as a platform of information and experience, hoping to reach out and advocate. But, in this process I realized I am not ready to do this. It's not that I am not ready to share and help others. I am just not ready to sit down and relive it all yet. The stories and experience are still to raw. I still have nightmares of Lydia being taken away, and Zac being left in the hospital. It was too much to sit down and dig it all back up. I would leave the computer exhausted and therefore, I would just avoid it all together.

I was also completely conflicted with putting The Bug's story out there for the world to dissect. Sure, Seth and I went through hell and back and yes, I want to help others...BUT, this is Lydia's story too and I am not sure that it is fair of me to share HER story, at least not so publicly.

And then I feel bad because, how do I help others but not tell my story. Well, I have thought about that too. I am going to renew my former private blog. Our story was documented from day one. If you are a follower and I have gotten to know me. I will send you the link and the password.

But as for THIS blog...I want to keep it in the HERE and NOW. I want to rejoice my kids and tell funny stories and also share my frustrations as a mom, wife and so on. This is our life now and I just want it to be light and fun.

I hope you all understand that I am STILL HERE if you have questions or know someone else who does. It is still very important to me to help. Foster and adoptive parents will always take a back seat to birth parents, but they still have rights, and everyone should know that.

Peace Out... You will be seeing me much more regularly now. Yaaaaa!


  1. Wow very small world - I have a feeling we'll be at Cross Corner quite a bit this fall :) I would love to read the stories of your kids adoption - if you felt comfortable sharing the private blog. My email is
    and I agree GO DORES, and VOLS, and TITANS!!!

  2. Hey girl. I totally understand and respect your decision to keep the kiddos stories on your private blog. Although I have no experience at all with the foster system and adoption process, I was stunned to read all that you guys have been through with your precious babies. I would love to read more of the story if you are comfortable with that! My email is Have a great week! :)

  3. Hi.It's Snarky Mom from Postcards from Insanity. I'd love to read your private blog, I have a feeling that you and I have shared some of the same experiences. I started writing out our story and haven't been able to finish it yet. I'm torn. My email is

  4. Hey Katie~ I found you through your comment on Snarky Mom's and am in the process of the foster-to-adopt process myself. My husband and I have been waiting on our first placement for over 3 months now, so I would love to be able to read your private blog for any advice/insight that you give. If you are willing to allow me to read along, my email address is Thanks!